Reasons for living and the "rock bottom" strengths for survival

December 31, 2007

I have difficulty saying “Happy New Year”

It is difficult to celebrate the New Year and get into a festival mood, when you are going through a fiery trial. Right at this very moment, millions are struggling desperately in desperate situations. Here are some scenarios that immediately come to mind:

· The intrusive surgery and toxic chemo-therapy seem more difficult to endure than the deadly cancer. The pain and the horrible nauseating feeling would not go away.

· Working on 18-shifts in sweat shops, they constantly fight off the pull to fall asleep so that they would not get fired or punished. The live like slaves without rights and freedom seven days a week, but they stay on because they need the job to support their starving families back home.

· Nature disaster has claimed all their family members. With nothing left, no one left, and no energy left, they are down but not out – they are still trying incredibly hard to get back on their feet.

· They have been languishing in prison for years simply for their political views or religious beliefs. They are acquainted with hunger, torture, abuse and all kinds of atrocities, but their conscience would not allow them to sign a false confession and betray their friends in order to get out of jail.

· They have been without food and water for days, but they are still on the run and hiding from the soldiers, who have slaughtered hundreds of thousands of their trible. For these homeless refugees, every passing minute is filled with fear and tears, as they have witnessed their children and loved ones dying from starvation, diseases and machetes.

As I watch on TV the revelers ringing the New Years with their exuberant song and dance, hugs and kisses, and cheerful shouts of “Happy New Year”, I only feel sadness as my thoughts turn to all the suffering people around the world.

I ask myself: How would you cope if you are in the kind of noxious situations I have just described? Would you feel optimistic and expect great things for 2008, when every day is a bad day and the future looks as bleak as the past? Would you think about how to pursue happiness when you only have enough energy to cling to life and cope with pain?

It is difficult for the well-fed to understand those living with starvation.

It is difficult for the healthy to understand those dying of terminal cancer.

People who drive around in luxury cars and walk in fancy leather boots could not understand those have to walk on the snow without shoes.

The world of the haves is very different from the world of have-nots.

The human existence with temporal comforts is very different from that full of afflictions.

At this very moment, I have difficult saying “Happy New Year” to those who are going through hell, because that would be insensitive and inappropriate. What they need most is that someone who would be standing by them to share their suffering and give them reasons for living.

(I wrote the above on Dec.31 and Jan.1. Now I want to complete what has been on my mind)

January 2, 2007

Reasons for living

Viktor Frankl discovered the secret of unimaginable resilience in the midst of unimaginable suffering.

Throughout his years in Nazi death camps, Frankl has learned that “the will to meaning” and the defiant human spirit are essential for surviving extreme sufferings and hardships. To put it simply, all those who refuse to succumb to ill fate and struggle gallantly to survive are individuals who have reasons for living.

Which ones of the following reasons for living enabled Frankl to survive the Holocaust?

Find happiness
Make good money
Become famous
Love people
Serve a cause greater than oneself
Believe that there is something good and meaningful in life

“Rock bottom” human strengths for survival

Those who have read Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning will realize that the last three reasons were primarily responsible for sustaining Frankl:

Everyone has signature strengths, but these three are the universal “rock bottom” human strengths essential for resilience: love, self-transcendent service and faith.

To have someone to love and cherish is a potent source of strength for the afflicted and tormented. While in the concentration camps where few ever came out alive, Frankl’s undying love for his wife and his hope of seeing her again gave him the reason to go on living. .

Pursuing a cause greater than oneself is another powerful source of resilience. One of Frankl’s missions in the camps was to share his insight on “the will to meaning” with other inmates so that they could recover their human dignity and meaning in life. A related larger mission was to complete his book on logotherapy which would help millions of the suffering masses.

Faith is often the only flicker of light in a long, dark tunnel. Frankl maintained his faith that one can always discover something positive, something meaningful regardless how horrible and hopeless the situations. He believed that this “will to meaning” is essential for human survival and flourishing.

Therefore, my New Year wish for everyone is that we discover these three “rock bottom” strengths, which will not only define our humanity but also ensure its survival in the most hostile situations. These three virtues are also the bedrock of enduring civilizations in both East and West.

Paul Wong
www.meaning.ca